LANGLEY AFB, VA. –
It's a commander's worst nightmare.
Although it's been more than 14 years, Lt. Col. Dane West, 1st Aircraft Maintenance Squadron commander, will never forget the day one of his troops committed suicide.
To this day, he shares his experience with everyone he can in the hopes of preventing the same unnecessary, tragic loss of life. For sensitivity to the victim and his family, we will refer to the deceased as Staff Sgt. Smith.
November 1992
Staff Sgt. Smith, 27 years old and married with two children, was having marital problems. He drove out to the woods and ingested pills and alcohol in an attempt to kill himself. At some point, he changed his mind, drove himself to the hospital and had his stomach pumped. He survived.
He was required to go to mental health, and although he was later cleared as "good to go," Colonel West, his flight commander at the time, wasn't sure he would be able to function in his job.
"I decided to move Sergeant Smith from the testing to training section, and looking back now, I think that move isolated him from his peers and probably resulted in a loss of self-esteem," Colonel West said.
Feb. 5, 1993
Sergeant Smith's wife had just filed for divorce, his world was falling apart and he decided to purchase a 9mm gun.
Feb. 8, 1993
Sergeant Smith picked up his weapon from the store (he had purchased it by credit card) and went home where his wife was alone. He pulled the gun on her until she agreed to call the lawyer and call off the divorce proceedings. The lawyer understood what was going on and called the police. A hostage situation ensued when they arrived; the wife made a dash for the door, but Sergeant Smith didn't fire his weapon.
He refused to leave the house, retreated to the bedroom in the bathroom and fired a single, fatal shot into his head.
Colonel West was appointed as the summary court officer and was responsible for taking care of the financial needs of Sergeant Smith's wife and children - a 2-year-old son and a 10-year-old daughter.
"When I went to the morgue to gather his personal effects - I was in shock," Colonel West said.
Sergeant Smith's daughter had made him a bracelet that he had been wearing at the time of his suicide. Colonel West washed the blood from it and tried to return it to the daughter.
"Her screams clearly expressed her desire that it be buried with him, and it carried weight with me of how much a suicide shakes a family," he said.
Feb. 9 - March 1993
Through the investigations, it came out that there were some telltale signs that Sergeant Smith was suicidal, but because no person ever saw more than one sign - no one put two and two together. In fact, the day he shot himself, Sergeant Smith had undergone minor surgery to remove a mole on his face.
"It seemed he had some intention of sticking around," Colonel West said.
March 1993 - November 2007
Throughout the years, the colonel has looked back and wished he could do things differently.
"First of all, I wouldn't have isolated him, but instead, I would've gotten him back in the fight. The social aspect of a recovering individual who's contemplating suicide cannot be underestimated," he said.
Colonel West also said he would have found out who had regular contact with Sergeant Smith and would have established regular, weekly meetings to compare notes and see how he was doing.
"The suicidal warning signs seemed to pop up randomly - not for very long, and always for different people," he added.
He said he would have met with the doctors. He later found out Sergeant Smith's only brother had committed suicide. He would have asked the mental health professionals what else he could do to help. He would have involved the chaplain and asked him to make periodic visits. He also would have ensured that family advocacy had a role to see how the family was doing after the first suicide attempt.
Today
Although his role as summary court officer only lasted 30 days, the effect it had on his life will last a lifetime. Colonel West keeps a record of the case and makes all of his first sergeants read it.
He stresses to them and everyone not to wait for suicide signs to manifest before taking action, and if someone could be contemplating suicide - more than anything they need support from peers, supervisors, chaplains and mental health professionals.
"I want to make sure that they learn the lessons that I learned and hopefully, we can prevent this sort of tragedy from ever happening again," he said.