LANGLEY AIR FORCE BASE, Virginia –
The hitting, the insults, the language, the control, the lies ... they should never become part of a relationship -- especially if those in the relationship aren’t even out of their teens.
National Teen Dating Violence Week was Feb. 6-10. It was created in order raise awareness about a dark and growing trend in today’s young people.
According to the National Youth Violence Prevention Resource Center, teen dating violence occurs in three major forms: sexual, physical, psychological and emotional.
This violence occurs in all types of relationship -- from casual dating to serious, long-term relationships.
Psychological and emotional abuse includes insults, humiliation, swearing, controlling another’s activities, isolating them or trying to destroy another’s self-esteem.
Sexual abuse refers to forced, unwanted sexual activities, including rape. Coercion and pressuring someone into sex also falls under this category.
Physical abuse covers hitting, slapping, shoving, kicking, punching, biting, hair-pulling, use of a weapon like a club, gun or knife against a boyfriend or girlfriend.
This category differs greatly among the sexes because of average physical stature and demeanor between boys and girls -- males don’t find abuse by the female as serious, and females are more likely to suffer from the violence emotionally and physically.
“There are a few signs you might be in a potentially violent relationship,” said Master Sgt. William Hawkins, 1st Fighter Wing Military Equal Opportunity. “You should ask yourself if your significant other makes you feel comfortable. Also, does the person seem easily annoyed or short with you or others? Do they respect you based on what you share with them?”
Sergeant Hawkins also noted that while people should be careful when removing themselves from that relationship, it’s important they do so. If someone realizes they’re in a potentially bad relationship, they should break it off immediately.
“The best predictor of future behavior is past behavior,” said Sergeant Hawkins. “Whatever behaviors you see that you don’t like, you can only expect to see more ... no matter how cute he or she is.”
If someone feels a friend is in such a relationship, they should speak with their friend about it, noted Sergeant Hawkins. There are ways to help people realize they’re in a bad relationship. They’ll defend their relationship if you approach them about it, but if you carefully ask questions that force them to think about how their relationship is, its better than just telling them its bad and going to get worse.
“Relationships don’t work themselves out,” said Sergeant Hawkins. “People do, but only if they want to.”